dear_prudence: (Default)
[personal profile] dear_prudence
humans and cats,
my name is niamh. essie is my human, and i am using her computer and her blog to tell you about a great peril that faces the world today. that peril is the bubble.

exhibit a: bubble


bubbles are a threat to the cleanliness of whiskers everywhere. they are sticky, and they taste gross. what's more they are very tricky to watch because they tend to travel in cloudlike groups. every cat knows that things that move must be watched very carefully, and things that are hard to watch are very suspicious (see also: laserlight, mouse, moth, lizard, things on strings).





there is only one solution to the bubble epidemic: they must be destroyed. i have found that the best method of bubble destruction is the good old fashioned 'bat' or 'swat' motion that your cat (or a friends cat if you have not yet been adopted by one yourself) will have demonstrated on many an occasion. the method is also effective for 'making string move', 'moth control', and 'human baiting'. allow me to demonstrate:











sometimes bubbles will get clever, and hover just out of reach. they will mock you by floating tantalizingly close, but remaining out of batting distance. this is evidence of their evil and sadistic natures:





you can lure them back in your direction by lulling them into a false sense of security, like so:





remember - a bubble is not a friend, nor is it a toy. it is a mortal enemy. stay vigilant, bat well, and send me pilchards as thanks for my gracious and informative warning,

niamh.

Date: 2009-05-09 07:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bondchick-nett.livejournal.com
The cutest thing EVER? I believe we just witnessed it.

Date: 2009-05-09 07:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
thank you, aunty nett. say hi to java for me, and tell him to keep an eye out for bubbles over there.
*lick*

Date: 2009-05-09 07:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] suspicion-bells.livejournal.com
Awww, this post is adorable!!!

HELLO NIAMH!! =D

Date: 2009-05-09 07:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
hello kylie! i hope you are keeping an eye out for bubbles over west. i'm not sure if bunnies are as good at batting as kitties are!
*purr*

Date: 2009-05-09 07:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] suspicion-bells.livejournal.com
I have a human child who likes to bat them :)

Date: 2009-05-09 08:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
that is very lucky for you. set it to work at the first sign of bubble invasion!

Date: 2009-05-09 08:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] piecesofalice.livejournal.com
Awww, Niamhie. If I were there, I'd help you bat those bubbles away. (But Harvey might get jealous, so shhhh.)

Date: 2009-05-09 08:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
all paws are welcome in this fight - harvey's would be an asset to the cause, so he could help too.
i hope you are having a happy night, aunty amanda. essie says she will be happy to see you tomorrow.
*purr*

Date: 2009-05-09 08:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] piecesofalice.livejournal.com
*scritchies*

Date: 2009-05-09 09:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glittery-girl.livejournal.com
LOL!
That's so cute. I can see why you want to marry your camera given it can capture shots like that!

Date: 2009-05-09 09:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
yes, i am quite cute, aren't i?
i will not let essie marry her camera, because then she would have less time to scritch and cuddle me. she says you have a little black cat too. you are a clever human for having a little black cat in your house. we are the best.

Date: 2009-05-09 10:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glittery-girl.livejournal.com
Ah yes, the little black cat... too cute, so they get away with too much.. tell me - does Essie let you sleep in her washing basket, leaving black hair everywhere because you're so irresistibly cute?

Date: 2009-05-09 09:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tracer123.livejournal.com
Oh sage and venerable feline, your wisdom will guide my days.

Date: 2009-05-09 09:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
well, duh!

p.s. you are clearly a good human who understands the order of nature. i presume some clever cats have adopted you and taught you how not to be stupid, like other humans. if you ever come to visit, i will let you pat me.

Date: 2009-05-09 12:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tracer123.livejournal.com
This, oh perspicacious one, I will look forward to with pleasure.

Date: 2009-05-09 09:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lalumena.livejournal.com
every cat knows that things that move must be watched very carefully, and things that are hard to watch are very suspicious
oh, this is so very true! you are a wise wise cat, niamh. :)

(to essie: gorgeous photos! they really capture the moment(s), so well)

Date: 2009-05-09 09:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
thank you, yes. i am quite clever.
essie says that you are very clever too, especially at taking photos. she also says that she is not totally happy with these ones because i was moving around too quickly and she didn't have time to adjust the direction of the flash like she normally would. it is not her fault that i am so speedy. the bubbles were a pressing threat, and i know that i am pretty no matter what, so that's ok with me.

Date: 2009-05-09 10:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] baggers.livejournal.com
CAT-BLOGGER, YOU SPEAK THE TRUTH. FIGHT THE BUBBLES!

Date: 2009-05-10 11:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
oh, i will! *watches*

Date: 2009-05-09 10:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nixwilliams.livejournal.com
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. eee.

Date: 2009-05-10 11:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
o hai. i love you.
*purr*

Bitey cat says:

Date: 2009-05-09 11:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] suburbannoir.livejournal.com
There have been no sign of bubbles here, but I am remaining vigilant.
Edited Date: 2009-05-09 11:28 am (UTC)

Re: Bitey cat says:

Date: 2009-05-10 11:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
well done, agent harvey! i am sure you have that side of the city covered!

Date: 2009-05-09 12:27 pm (UTC)
ext_106447: (cheetahs)
From: [identity profile] metal-dog.livejournal.com
I am very impressed at the ploy of nonchalant grooming to lure the hapless bubble into yr orbit. Tris does that too, but forgets about the pouncing bit sometimes.

Date: 2009-05-10 11:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
washing is very important, so i can understand tris getting distracted. but if there were menacing bubbles around i am sure he would know what his duty was!

Date: 2009-05-09 07:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] binka-boo.livejournal.com
<3

thanks neeeevie :) i shall pass this informatino on to lilah. she is not blach, but she loves to bat things, so i'm sure she'll be very excited to be enlisted for the cause.

also, i miss you and your humans.
Edited Date: 2009-05-09 07:19 pm (UTC)

Date: 2009-05-10 11:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
your scritchies are missed too. come home soon.

oh, and i have seen evidence of lilah's killin' skillz:
Image
she can help with the bubble massacre any time she likes.
Edited Date: 2009-05-10 11:22 pm (UTC)

Date: 2009-05-11 04:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] binka-boo.livejournal.com
*virtual scritchies* you know, i think lilah misses my scritchies too, but she's with my mum who is an excellent scritcher.

Date: 2009-05-09 07:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] skadi.livejournal.com
*giggles*

I'll let Neptune read this later. I'm sure he concurs with Niamh.

Date: 2009-05-10 11:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
i'm certain neptune has already read it. don't you know that we use your computers to read the internet while you are out?

Date: 2009-05-10 01:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nalathilion.livejournal.com

*watches out for niamh's claws of doom*

Date: 2009-05-10 11:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
you're right, my claws are very dangerous. but i hardly ever use them on humans (usuallu only when they try to give me medicines or take me to the V.E.T.), so don't worry!

Date: 2009-05-10 08:24 pm (UTC)
ext_101249: (Stock: Big yawn Kitty)
From: [identity profile] autumnjoy.livejournal.com
I shall relay the information on to the two cats gracious enough to reside in my house. :)

Date: 2009-05-10 11:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
you are a clever human.

Date: 2009-05-11 11:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] porcelaines.livejournal.com
random:
I saw this and it reminded me of you!!
:D

Date: 2009-05-11 11:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
hee - i want that on a tee shirt XD

p.s. did i lend you the re-bar cookbook back in the day? we've been looking for our copy and it's not turning up anywhere...

Date: 2009-05-11 11:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] porcelaines.livejournal.com
I know! That's the exact think I thought when I saw it!

You did lend it to me, but I am most certain that I gave it back to you along with a few other books you had lent!
:)
It was a great cook book!

Date: 2009-05-11 11:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
yeah, i figured you'd have given it back. the mystery remains!

how have you been, anyway?

Date: 2009-05-11 11:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] porcelaines.livejournal.com
damn!

I've been okay! School's been pretty busy. You know how I stress over things ;)
I should get around to posting soon but I feel like I don't have anything important to say!
How have you been?

Date: 2009-05-11 11:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
it's a blog - the point is to rant about unimportant things XD

i am busy and stressed as usual. uni is intense at the moment. i am writing a really interesting paper about this guy who had bits of his brain cut out, and then couldn't form any new memories. its really amazing.

Date: 2009-05-11 11:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] porcelaines.livejournal.com
True! I should be less self conscious!

agh.
That does sound pretty amazing, though. The brain is fascinating. At least there's a lot to say!
And I imagine a great sense of accomplishment will come once you've finished the paper :)
Good luck!

Date: 2009-05-11 12:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
i don't get to feel accomplished til exams are over.
OMGSOMUCHTODO!!! *hyperventilates*

Date: 2009-05-11 12:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] porcelaines.livejournal.com
We Scorpios stress far too much, when apparently we are always brilliant in the end :P
wait.. you are a scorpio aren't you?!

TEA! lots of TEA!

Date: 2009-05-11 12:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dear-prudence.livejournal.com
yes, i am!
i think the problem is that i am so used to putting all this pressure on myself, that i think that if i STOP putting the pressure on, i won't do as well... :-/
*keeps working*

Date: 2009-05-11 12:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] porcelaines.livejournal.com
I know exactly what you mean!
Old habits die hard and all the rest..

Good luck again!! All the effort will certainly get you places :D

Date: 2009-05-12 07:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neko-seraph.livejournal.com
Oh wise Niamh of the perfect whiskers, you are so very right.

Young Nazilla (who has deigned to live with me so that I can learn the value of being woken up before my alarm goes off to administer scritches) will be most interested to hear of this new menace - fortunately our house is threatened only by the Red Dot and the Empty Toilet Roll, both of which she hunts without mercy.
Edited Date: 2009-05-13 03:06 am (UTC)

Date: 2009-10-08 12:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] qu-is.livejournal.com
I love this post!

Some amazing photos, i really like the first one and the one where you can see the calws out and the two bubbles and the pink pillow.

I've not been adopted by a cat but this almost makes me wish i had.

:)

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